MY rants. Not yours, MINE.

Alright well...I have noticed something.
It's very important.
All of you seem to not be taking these facts of life seriously, so I must inform you of how these will be helpful for you.
And how they are indeed, not funny, but serious.
My first fact: Suicides often happen on Mondays.
THAT IS SERIOUS BEYOND WORDS.
Seriously.
I'm a sick person at best, but if you're laughing at suicide, ....
I have no comment for you. At all.
My second fact: You eat spiders
HOW DO YOU THINK THOSE SPIDERS FEEL??
Seriously, they get ATE by us. They have to go through YOUR STOMACH ACID. That stuff BURNS. It takes your particles and BUUUUUUUUURNS THEM. and you FEEL IT. EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT. Until you die. Then it's over.
My third fact: Males dream of other Males.
...Yeah, haha. Laugh at your gay inner self. AHAHAHA. Hey you're right, it is funny ;D
My fourth fact: Coconuts kill people
...this is almost as bad as the suicide thing. I mean how would you feel?
Guy 1: So, how'd you die?
Guy 2: Well, there was a kid in the middle of the road. I shoved him out of the way of a truck, and I died.
Guy 1: Oh, how horrible!
Guy 2: Yeah. Kids okay though! So, how'd you die
Guy 1: .......a coconut killed me.
My fifth fact: The dot over the i is called a tittle.
Okay, this could very well save your life one day.
I'm serious.
ONE DAY YOU WILL BE TAKEN HOSTAGE, AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO SAVE YOU BECAUSE I'M BUSY EATING CHOCOLATE AND THEY WILL SAY:
Kidnapper: Okay, you answer me these questions three---"
You: Isn't that from monty python?
Kidnapper: Shut up, or I'll never let you leave. Now, answer me these questions three and let you free I shall.
You: Okay...
Kidnapper: What, is your name?
You: Dalamingderflagni (Obviously you'd give your name here. Not this guys. They'll just kill you.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is your favourite colour?
You: graple. (again, your colour, not his.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dot above the lower case i called?
You: OH FRICK I DON'T KNOW T HAT!
Kidnapper: *BLOWS YOUR BRAINS OUT.*
Alternatively....:
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dor above the lower case 'i' called?
You: A tittle ;D
Kidnapper: DAMMIT. Kay go.

...the tiles was completely for your entertainment. Laugh at that all you want.
BUT CLEARLY these are very useful life lessons, and not something to be taken lightly. I mean you probably didn't know half of these before. You'd go under a coconut tree thinking "lol, nothing can happen." an dthen BAM. IT HAPPENS. YOU DIED.
YOU'RE DEAD. OH NO.
But now that won't happen because I've warned you, and you don't want to die.

Rev wrote:

Alright well...I have noticed something.
It's very important.
All of you seem to not be taking these facts of life seriously, so I must inform you of how these will be helpful for you.
And how they are indeed, not funny, but serious.
My first fact: Suicides often happen on Mondays.
THAT IS SERIOUS BEYOND WORDS.
Seriously.
I'm a sick person at best, but if you're laughing at suicide, ....
I have no comment for you. At all.
My second fact: You eat spiders
HOW DO YOU THINK THOSE SPIDERS FEEL??
Seriously, they get ATE by us. They have to go through YOUR STOMACH ACID. That stuff BURNS. It takes your particles and BUUUUUUUUURNS THEM. and you FEEL IT. EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT. Until you die. Then it's over.
My third fact: Males dream of other Males.
...Yeah, haha. Laugh at your gay inner self. AHAHAHA. Hey you're right, it is funny ;D
My fourth fact: Coconuts kill people
...this is almost as bad as the suicide thing. I mean how would you feel?
Guy 1: So, how'd you die?
Guy 2: Well, there was a kid in the middle of the road. I shoved him out of the way of a truck, and I died.
Guy 1: Oh, how horrible!
Guy 2: Yeah. Kids okay though! So, how'd you die
Guy 1: .......a coconut killed me.
My fifth fact: The dot over the i is called a tittle.
Okay, this could very well save your life one day.
I'm serious.
ONE DAY YOU WILL BE TAKEN HOSTAGE, AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO SAVE YOU BECAUSE I'M BUSY EATING CHOCOLATE AND THEY WILL SAY:
Kidnapper: Okay, you answer me these questions three---"
You: Isn't that from monty python?
Kidnapper: Shut up, or I'll never let you leave. Now, answer me these questions three and let you free I shall.
You: Okay...
Kidnapper: What, is your name?
You: Dalamingderflagni (Obviously you'd give your name here. Not this guys. They'll just kill you.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is your favourite colour?
You: graple. (again, your colour, not his.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dot above the lower case i called?
You: OH FRICK I DON'T KNOW T HAT!
Kidnapper: *BLOWS YOUR BRAINS OUT.*
Alternatively....:
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dor above the lower case 'i' called?
You: A tittle ;D
Kidnapper: DAMMIT. Kay go.

...the tiles was completely for your entertainment. Laugh at that all you want.
BUT CLEARLY these are very useful life lessons, and not something to be taken lightly. I mean you probably didn't know half of these before. You'd go under a coconut tree thinking "lol, nothing can happen." an dthen BAM. IT HAPPENS. YOU DIED.
YOU'RE DEAD. OH NO.
But now that won't happen because I've warned you, and you don't want to die.

what.

TehMatulaak wrote:

Rev wrote:

Alright well...I have noticed something.
It's very important.
All of you seem to not be taking these facts of life seriously, so I must inform you of how these will be helpful for you.
And how they are indeed, not funny, but serious.
My first fact: Suicides often happen on Mondays.
THAT IS SERIOUS BEYOND WORDS.
Seriously.
I'm a sick person at best, but if you're laughing at suicide, ....
I have no comment for you. At all.
My second fact: You eat spiders
HOW DO YOU THINK THOSE SPIDERS FEEL??
Seriously, they get ATE by us. They have to go through YOUR STOMACH ACID. That stuff BURNS. It takes your particles and BUUUUUUUUURNS THEM. and you FEEL IT. EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT. Until you die. Then it's over.
My third fact: Males dream of other Males.
...Yeah, haha. Laugh at your gay inner self. AHAHAHA. Hey you're right, it is funny ;D
My fourth fact: Coconuts kill people
...this is almost as bad as the suicide thing. I mean how would you feel?
Guy 1: So, how'd you die?
Guy 2: Well, there was a kid in the middle of the road. I shoved him out of the way of a truck, and I died.
Guy 1: Oh, how horrible!
Guy 2: Yeah. Kids okay though! So, how'd you die
Guy 1: .......a coconut killed me.
My fifth fact: The dot over the i is called a tittle.
Okay, this could very well save your life one day.
I'm serious.
ONE DAY YOU WILL BE TAKEN HOSTAGE, AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO SAVE YOU BECAUSE I'M BUSY EATING CHOCOLATE AND THEY WILL SAY:
Kidnapper: Okay, you answer me these questions three---"
You: Isn't that from monty python?
Kidnapper: Shut up, or I'll never let you leave. Now, answer me these questions three and let you free I shall.
You: Okay...
Kidnapper: What, is your name?
You: Dalamingderflagni (Obviously you'd give your name here. Not this guys. They'll just kill you.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is your favourite colour?
You: graple. (again, your colour, not his.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dot above the lower case i called?
You: OH FRICK I DON'T KNOW T HAT!
Kidnapper: *BLOWS YOUR BRAINS OUT.*
Alternatively....:
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dor above the lower case 'i' called?
You: A tittle ;D
Kidnapper: DAMMIT. Kay go.

...the tiles was completely for your entertainment. Laugh at that all you want.
BUT CLEARLY these are very useful life lessons, and not something to be taken lightly. I mean you probably didn't know half of these before. You'd go under a coconut tree thinking "lol, nothing can happen." an dthen BAM. IT HAPPENS. YOU DIED.
YOU'RE DEAD. OH NO.
But now that won't happen because I've warned you, and you don't want to die.

what.

The Fuck?

Deks™ wrote:

TehMatulaak wrote:

Rev wrote:

Alright well...I have noticed something.
It's very important.
All of you seem to not be taking these facts of life seriously, so I must inform you of how these will be helpful for you.
And how they are indeed, not funny, but serious.
My first fact: Suicides often happen on Mondays.
THAT IS SERIOUS BEYOND WORDS.
Seriously.
I'm a sick person at best, but if you're laughing at suicide, ....
I have no comment for you. At all.
My second fact: You eat spiders
HOW DO YOU THINK THOSE SPIDERS FEEL??
Seriously, they get ATE by us. They have to go through YOUR STOMACH ACID. That stuff BURNS. It takes your particles and BUUUUUUUUURNS THEM. and you FEEL IT. EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT. Until you die. Then it's over.
My third fact: Males dream of other Males.
...Yeah, haha. Laugh at your gay inner self. AHAHAHA. Hey you're right, it is funny ;D
My fourth fact: Coconuts kill people
...this is almost as bad as the suicide thing. I mean how would you feel?
Guy 1: So, how'd you die?
Guy 2: Well, there was a kid in the middle of the road. I shoved him out of the way of a truck, and I died.
Guy 1: Oh, how horrible!
Guy 2: Yeah. Kids okay though! So, how'd you die
Guy 1: .......a coconut killed me.
My fifth fact: The dot over the i is called a tittle.
Okay, this could very well save your life one day.
I'm serious.
ONE DAY YOU WILL BE TAKEN HOSTAGE, AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO SAVE YOU BECAUSE I'M BUSY EATING CHOCOLATE AND THEY WILL SAY:
Kidnapper: Okay, you answer me these questions three---"
You: Isn't that from monty python?
Kidnapper: Shut up, or I'll never let you leave. Now, answer me these questions three and let you free I shall.
You: Okay...
Kidnapper: What, is your name?
You: Dalamingderflagni (Obviously you'd give your name here. Not this guys. They'll just kill you.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is your favourite colour?
You: graple. (again, your colour, not his.)
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dot above the lower case i called?
You: OH FRICK I DON'T KNOW T HAT!
Kidnapper: *BLOWS YOUR BRAINS OUT.*
Alternatively....:
Kidnapper: WHAT is the dor above the lower case 'i' called?
You: A tittle ;D
Kidnapper: DAMMIT. Kay go.

...the tiles was completely for your entertainment. Laugh at that all you want.
BUT CLEARLY these are very useful life lessons, and not something to be taken lightly. I mean you probably didn't know half of these before. You'd go under a coconut tree thinking "lol, nothing can happen." an dthen BAM. IT HAPPENS. YOU DIED.
YOU'RE DEAD. OH NO.
But now that won't happen because I've warned you, and you don't want to die.

what.

The Fuck?

Thank you. You finished my sentence for me.

These are life lessons not to be taken lightly. I just elaborated on why it's so important to take these lessons seriously.

I'm not sure if I want to cry, or if I want to jump around in circles with joy.
So, we all know I like to doodle, right? No? Well, i do. In fact, I like to doodle a lot. My teachers don't really approve, even though they tell me to keep at it......they're bipolar. I'm sticking with that. But this is all besides the point.
You see, I have school starting soon, right? So, obviously I need to get out of my habit of staying up till like 5 before passing out 'cause everyone else has passed out an I got nothing better to do because I can only doodle for so long.
So I thought "Hey, why don't I pull an all-nighter?" So I did.
Guess what I learned during this all-nighter? That's right.
I doodle better when I'm sleep deprived
HOW THE HELL DOES THAT WORK!?!?!
Liker seriously. Usually it takes me like four tries to get the perfect head. This all-nighter, got it in the first shot. Hair, I spend like ten minutes trying to figure out a good design. All-nighter did it in two shots. Eye? That was the ONLY thing that all-nighter didn't do in one-shot. It took me like 5 shots to get the perfect eye. BUT THE REST OF HIM WAS SO PERFECT I WANTED TO CRY.
Then I got to his retarded body.
I wanted to die.
Seriously.
And by the time I finally got a half decent body, I forgot about clothes, so he was a buff half naked guy until I realized he really needed clothes.
My sleep deprived mind:
"HE HAS AN EYEPATCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS RIGHT? THATS RIGHT. ARCHER!!!"
What I would've thought if I wasn't sleep deprived:
"He has an eyepatch....PIRATE NINJA TIME!!! And we'll give him an Alice in Wonderland theme too...."
My mind right now:
MUST....ERASE....CLOTHES......HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE........
So, as I'm sitting here criticizing what my mind comes up with at 6 AM, I wonder,
Do zombies ever feel unpretty? I mean, I know they're kinda half-dead and everything but...
Zombies have feelings too, you know! Not easily recognizable feelings, but feelings nevertheless!
Nobody ever thinks what zombies feel like. I mena it's always
"AAHHHH!! ZOMBIE !!! OMG RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!"
But, what if that zombie only wanted a hug? I mean, it might think it smells, or something.
Okay it probably does, it's rotting flesh after all, but STILL
Zombies need the luvs too.